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| #991 |  | Fear is the greatest salesman. -- Robert Klein
 
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| #992 |  | Feel disillusioned?  I've got some great new illusions, right here! 
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| #993 |  | For every bloke who makes his mark, there's half a dozen waiting to rub it out. -- Andy Capp
 
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| #994 |  | Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety-nine percent perspiration. -- Thomas Alva Edison
 
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| #995 |  | Genius is ten percent inspiration and fifty percent capital gains. 
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| #996 |  | Getting the job done is no excuse for not following the rules. 
 Corollary:
 Following the rules will not get the job done.
 
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| #997 |  | "Given the choice between accomplishing something and just lying around, I'd rather lie around.  No contest."
 -- Eric Clapton
 
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| #998 |  | God help those who do not help themselves. -- Wilson Mizner
 
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| #999 |  | God helps them that help themselves. -- Benjamin Franklin, "Poor Richard's Almanac"
 
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| #1000 |  | Good day to avoid cops.  Crawl to work. 
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|   ...            ...   |